The Book Of Khoreg

Chapter One

1. It was the time of entropy, the Gods were born of Order amid the sea of Chaos.
2. The firmament burned forth across the sky.
3. The moon was born in the torment of the earth.
4. The Sun burned cold in a sky of blood.

Chapter Two

1. Amid me sea of Chaos, the spirit of Khoreg shouted, “I will live.”
2. And the sea of Chaos beat upon him and he fought it and swam against it.
3. And the sea of Chaos sent great monsters against him and with his fists he beat them back. As their numbers grew he knew he must do more.
4. When the monsters attacked once more he ripped the limb from one and used it as a cudgel but still they came on. Khoreg could not freely swing his cudgel amid the waves.
5. So Khoreg seized the greatest of the monsters and leapt upon its back and with the cudgel he slew it. From his place upon its shoulders he slew the other creatures until their bodies piled up around him and became an island.
6. And the remaining monsters fled.
7. And Khoreg sat upon his island, looked upon the slain bodies of his foe and said, “Served the buggers right.”

Chapter Three

1. Other lands rose from amid the Sea of Chaos, other Gods emerged and some fought and some were friends.
2. The gods walked among the lands and the plants and the animals appeared. The sun shone warm and songs were sung under the moon.
3. And creatures came forth from the sea and the mountains and the gods fought them.
4. Khoreg saw that the axes and the spears of other gods were more terrible than was his own cudgel.
5. So as the gods fell back before the onslaught of the monsters.
6. Khoreg took up the weapons of two who fell.
7. But the monster's arms were longer than his axe and their skin too tough for the spear to pierce.
8. So Khoreg took the head of the axe and put it on the spear shaft. With this halberd he hewed the head from the creature called Gelgerrigoth.
9. And Khoreg lead the Gods forth.
10. And all that withstood him fell before him.
11. Even in the midst of his enemy none could withstand his anger.
12. But the enemy crept behind him and might have slain him had not Khorne the Ogre God come to his aid. Thus they fought back to back until the battle was won.
13. So Khoreg sat upon the field of victory and cried out, “I need a drink!”

Chapter Four

1. Bacchus the god of wine came unto Khoreg, bearing two bottles, and Khoreg poured both into one goblet and drank and said, “By heck I needed that.”
2. And Bacchus drank also and said “They do go rather well together don't they?”
3. So Khoreg took his ease and slept amid the slain.
4. When Khoreg awoke he looked around and the world seemed grim. He said unto Bacchus, “I will not try that again.”
5. And Bacchus replied, “That is what they all say. I say it every morning.”
6. And Khoreg took another drink and the world seemed a brighter place.
7. Bacchus called forth more drinks of all kinds and flavours and all the gods drank and celebrated their victory. The sun rose a dozen times upon their victory feast.
8. This was the only time all the gods and goddesses were in harmony.
9. On the thirteenth day Khoreg found the world more grim than it had been before. The Dwarf God said, “Drink of the river.”
10. And Khoreg drank of the river and stopped all its flow but the world was still grim.
11. The Dryad Goddess said, “Take a piece of the bark from the tree beside the river and chew it.” And Khoreg did so. And then he slept.
12. When Khoreg awoke and the world was bright once more he said to the Goddess, "That's one hell of a tree you have there. I'll keep that as sacred.”

Chapter Five

1. After the Feast of the Gods the deities went about finding themselves dwellings.
2. The elven gods went into the forests or built high towers of pearl. All save one who took the form of a spider and crept into the depths of the earth.
3. The dwarf gods carved halls of stone in the hills and the human gods sought places where food would grow. All the gods chose a place.
4. But Khoreg had no abode and wandered far into the mountains with other warlike gods and fought the giants and dragons there.
5. In all this time the wind blew only from the east, for there were no other winds and all the world save where the gods dwelt was bleak.
6. And Khoreg came down from the mountains and all the gods and goddesses asked him where he would dwell.
7. So Khoreg looked around at the slender elf towers and the wide dwarf caverns. At the welcoming human halls and the open lands of the centaurs.
8. And Khoreg said, “I will dwell somewhere strong.”
9. And Khoreg went to a lonely crag.
10. There in a single night arose his dwelling. He turned the very void into its moat and built mighty walls and sturdy gates, massive towers and cunning mazes.
11. And as the dawn came he rested and looked upon his works and was satisfied and whispered, “That should stop them nicking my beer.”

Chapter Six

1. The gods dreamed and the peoples walked upon the Earth.
2. And the peoples dreamed and the gods walked in the heavens.
3. The peoples chose their gods and worshipped them and the gods chose their people and ruled them.
4. But Khoreg had not slept and had not dreamed.
5. All the gods cried to Khoreg and mocked him and said, “You have not dreamed: who will your people be?”
6. Khoreg just smiled and said, “I will choose those who can fight”;
7. And warriors of all races came unto Khoreg and worshipped him. Some of the gods were glad but others were jealous.

Chapter Seven

1. The winter came and the bitter east wind froze even the lands of the gods. All suffered and the grapes of Bacchus froze on the vine and birds froze in the air.
2. In the caverns of the dwarf gods Khoreg sat beside the forge fire and watched the dwarves work.
3. A dwarf named Halin said to Khoreg, “That halberd you use is dulled.” “It is old and has been well used,” replied Khoreg.
4. And Halin said, “I will put an edge on it the like of which has never been seen.”
5. Since it could not easily have been made blunter Khoreg gave him the halberd.
6. And when the work was done and the blade shone red in the firelight, Halin swung the halberd and severed a pillar of stone and the roof fell and slew him.
7. Khoreg grieved and paid the dwarves a weregild in pure gold.
8. Out in the wild winter Khoreg howled his grief and whirled the blade about him and such was the edge that the East Wind itself was cloven.
9. The wind blew from all quarters and the east wind fled and the west wind blew and spring came.
10. Ever after Khoreg called his blade Brightwoe.

Chapter Eight

1. In the dark of a moonless night demons came forth from the pits of hell.
2. And they fell upon the peoples and brought terror and death upon them.
3. The trees of the dryads they burned, even the willow that Khoreg held sacred.
4. And Khoreg was wroth.
5. The terror that Khoreg visited upon the demons was great indeed. He slew them and those he slew not he bound with chains and cast them into the deepest dungeons of his fortress.

Chapter Nine

1. So the gods agreed that they should close off the Great Gate of Hell.
2. But the labour involved was great and they argued about who should perform this task.
3. So Khoreg said, “I'll make the demons do it.”
4. Then Khoreg went to the demons and spoke to Heiroth the greatest of the demons and said, “If you block the Gate of Hell I will set you free.”
5. Heiroth replied, “Captivity is no problem to me.” “You will regret it if you do not,” said Khoreg.
6. And Heiroth said, “I will not be your slave and should you slay me I am merely banished and so am freed.”
7. So Khoreg said, “I may not slay you but I can pull your hooves up your scrawny throat, out of your mouth and fasten them there with a silver pin.”
8. And Heiroth laughed, saying, “I am a lord of Hell: no-one can do that to me!”
9. So Khoreg spoke to K'gath the second greatest demon and said, “If you block the Gate of Hell I will set you free.”
10. And K'gath looked at the fate of Heiroth where he was hung by his tail above the void, with his feet pinned out of his mouth and said, “O.K. boss, where do I start?”
11. So the Great Gate of Hell was sealed.
12. But countless demons crept forth from all the lesser gates of hell and they took abode between the planes and plotted revenge upon the gods.
13. Some gods chose to ally with the demons at this time and plotted the downfall of all but themselves.

Chapter Ten

1. The seers among the gods saw that demons were to make war against them.
2. And the gods armed themselves and their peoples.
3. Some gods cried against those demons who laboured to bury the Gate of Hell and said they should be slain.
4. Khoreg spoke against this saying, “If they are working at my command then any who harm them will answer to me. I will do what needs to be done to close the gate. There's now't wrong with using demons to fight hell.”
5. But the gods struck down some of the demons and Khoreg was wroth but no god would admit the deed.
6. So Khoreg took all of his armies and returned to his fortress and watched the battles from afar.
7. Thus he saw great heroes dragged down, for they had none to watch their backs.
8. Thus he saw lesser warriors brought down for they fought alone though they fought side by side.
9. And within his fortress he drilled his troops that the same would not happen to them.
10. At last the demons came to the gate of his fortress. They called him to surrender. “Nothing has withstood us and you, whose army is a mix of men and women, elves and dwarves, ores and trolls, and whatever that hairy creature with the fangs and the battle-axe is, how can you defy us.”
11. And Khoreg replied, “I can defy you because they can all fight a damn sight better than you can.”
12. And the demons raged about the fortress.
13. And the armies within watched the demons rage and cried out, “You Sad Bastards. Get A Life!!”

Chapter Eleven

1. In the weeks that followed the demons laboured to build bridges across the void.
2. And the nights were lit with fire and were loud with the flapping of the leathern wings of demons.
3. The demon called Voorg landed upon the battlements and challenged Khoreg to single combat.
4. And the fight was long and bloody but Voorg was slain.
5. Even as Khoreg threw Voorg's corpse from the walls Moliach, a demon lord, attacked him.
6. Khoreg was already weary and this demon was greater than any he had fought.
7. Moliach drove Khoreg back against the wall so that his head and shoulders were over the void. Moliach laughed and proclaimed his victory.
8. But the warriors of Khoreg had dragged a great ballista up to the battlements and they loaded it with a dart of magic.
9. From close behind Moliach they fired it and the bolt pierced his body and Khoreg overthrew him.
10. Moliach called this unfair but Khoreg replied, “You had issued me no Challenge.”
11. And Moliach called this wrong, but Khoreg said, “There are only winners and corpses, and you are only whinging because you did not think of it first.”
12. So Khoreg cast Moliach into the Void.

Chapter Twelve

1. When the bridges reached the walls, ten thousand demons swarmed across.
2. Battle spread around all the walls and strife was all around.
3. Khoreg stood upon a great tower that he might view the battle.
4. There he saw the spirit of a warrior and said, “Why do you not fight?”
5. “I have already been slain.”
6. “Go back to the walls and fight,” ordered Khoreg.
7. “I am dead,” the spirit whispered.
8. “That is no excuse!”

Chapter Thirteen

1. Whilst all the attention of the demons was focused on the fortress of Khoreg, the other gods took council.
2. And they gathered their armies.
3. When all was ready they descended upon the hellish host.
4. That host fled yammering before them and many were cast into the Void.
5. And the host of Khoreg issued forth and the rout was complete.
6. Never again were demons gathered in such numbers and many defied their princes and hid from the light and would go no more to war.
7. And Khoreg turned to his fellows and said, “Such is the fate of those who don't watch their backs.”
8. “Bacchus, did you mention a drink?”
9. “No, but I was about to mention several,” that god replied.

Chapter Fourteen

1. And Khoreg was praised by the gods for his fortitude.
2. Khoreg asked again who had slain the demons that were in his care.
3. All the gods denied that they had done this.
4. But Khoreg noticed that the god of assassins was not in their number, though he had been there when the demons were slain.
5. So Khoreg and some other gods went in search of him.
6. They came to the dark place where the god of assassins dwelt and it was surrounded by traps.
7. But Bandobaris of the halflings crept forth and defused the traps that Khoreg might enter.
8. Khoreg entered the halls of the assassin.
9. And Khorne the God of the Ogres followed him at twice the length of a halberd and none saw Khorne, for Hecate the goddess of magic had made him invisible even to other gods.
10. Darkness fell about Khoreg but he whirled his halberd about his head and the assassins in the dark were slain.
11. When the god of assassins himself leapt upon Khoreg from behind, Khorne was ready and took the assassin prisoner.
12. And they hung the god of assassins by his heels above the void.
13. Other gods said, “But all he slew were a few demons.”
14. “Those demons were under my protection.”
15. “And, which is more, he did not say sorry,” was Khoreg's reply.

Chapter Fifteen

1. And Khoreg threw a great feast, and elixir flowed like water. A god of justice slept face down in the hall and the Lady Chastity changed her name.
2. Death walked the feast and demanded of Khoreg why those who should have entered his realm were there, feasting among the living.
3. Khoreg said that if they had fought beside the living they should feast beside them too.
4. “But they are mine,” cried Death.
5. “Not if they have the strength to keep their spirits from you,” said Khoreg.
6. “Most cannot and they are mine.”
7. “Well, that does not stop the bodies fighting if they must,” was Khoreg's reply.
8. “And anyway my worshippers have the strength of will.”
9. But many gods misliked the deathless bodies and called Khoreg evil. He heeded them not.

Chapter Sixteen

1. The followers of Khoreg cried unto him saying, “Make laws by which we know how to follow you.”
2. And Khoreg said, “Hush, know you not that I was at a party last night.”
3. And the followers of Khoreg whispered unto him saying, “Make laws by which we know how to follow you.”
4. “I know where I'm going, I will blast anyone who follows me and anyway the door will be locked.”
5. His followers then explained that what they wanted were guidelines, so that they could live their lives in the way of which Khoreg approved.

Chapter Seventeen

 The rules of Khoreg were as follows:
1. Do not shout at deities with hangovers.
2. If you have to stay sober it is nothing to boast of.
3. If you give your word, keep it, but do not give it lightly.
4. Death is no excuse.
5. Life is no excuse either.
6. War and skill at arms are both the means and the end.
7. Treat farmers well, as long as they cultivate fruit or grain that can be fermented into alcohol.
8. Honour your brewer, vintner and distiller.
9. Fell no willow trees, punish those who do.
10. Pain is good for the soul.
11. There are only winners and corpses: only fight fair on your honour.
12. Spare no effort in slaying those who break their honour.
13. Make sure someone is watching your back.
14. Beware of demons they can take many forms.
15. The ends justify the means, demons are a weapon if they are in your army but a hellish abomination in your foe's.
16. Mix equal parts of the wines of Opporto and Jerez. This is Elixir.
17. Mine's a pint.
18. Strive for glory, strive for truth.
19. KHOREGATE THE WORLD!

Chapter Eighteen

1. A creature crossed the land, bringing terror to the nights.
2. And the fortresses of the gods were closed lest it should creep from its unquiet grave to drink the blood of their peoples.
3. At last the creature came to the gates of the fortress of Khoreg.
4. In a voice that froze the blood it cried, “I am the unliving, I am Nosferatu, I am the Vampyre.”
5. And Khoreg went and opened the gates and admitted the creature saying, “Enter freely and of your own free will, sit down, have a drink.”
6. “I do not drink..........wine,” was the reply.
7. And Nosferatu leaped upon a servant to drink blood but it was a zombie and no blood ran in its veins.
8. And Nosferatu leaped upon a maid to drink her blood but she was a dryad and her veins ran with sap.
9. And Nosferatu leaped upon a guard to drink blood but he was a berserker as strong as Nosferatu and wore a collar of steel.
10. Nosferatu looked at Khoreg with new respect and said. “Let us be allies.”

Chapter Nineteen

1. By dark magic the demon Moliach crept from the void into the depths of the earth.
2. In the deep places of the world the dwarves walked in fear.
3. And in their very halls the dwarf gods wept, for Moliach had a ward-pact against them and their peoples.
4. Thus they called upon Khoreg for aid; he answered not.
5. They called in the name of Halin, and Khoreg went into the depths of the earth and slew Moliach.

Chapter Twenty

1. It shall be in the dark of the moon.
2. Once more the vines of Bacchus will shrivel where they grow. All wine will be soured.
3. The hills will give forth fire and the seas turn to blood.
4. Above the lamenting of the people will be heard the baying of the greatest of wolves.
5. When all the gods come to battle the balance itself will fall.
6. Without law the chaos sea will return.
7. Without chaos the world will be as dust.
8. Fear the war with no foe.
9. Fear the peace without end.
10. Drink deep Khoregate, drink the sour wine, taste the bitter dust.
11. Khoreg will return to the chaos sea but as his spirit will not be quenched he shall return. Greater than ever.
12. He will rule both heaven and hell, both earth and sky.